I don’t usually talk alot here about my kids or specific situations, but I’m really struggling right now.
Back in October, we took our 5 year old for his first eye exam after he failed a vision test at school. We discovered he has a lazy eye, basically. We went home with glasses ordered and a 6 month follow up scheduled. In 6 months, our son no longer goes cross eyed. Yet he still cannot see. I’m amazed he’s functioned so long with how terribly bad his eyes are.
We’re now onto step 2, patching his right eye in hopes that his left eye will grow stronger. I was aware this was going to happen, we were informed at our first appointment.
6 hours a day we’re to patch the right eye to help make the left eye stronger. Vision in the right eye is also bad, however, it’s growing weaker by overcompensating for the left eye.
Every night I have to come home and patch my child’s eye. I have to watch him bump into things, try to drink and spill it because he’s struggling to see. I have to watch him curl into a ball and cry because he is struggling so badly. Begging to go to bed at 6pm, when usually he’s crying and begging to stay up at 8pm. I wish I could make this better.
The struggle he has. Feeling as if he failed because he couldn’t see to tell us the letters at his eye exam. The tears when he heard the doctor say he had to wear a patch.
God this is hard.
If only he understood, no matter how much I tell him, that this is not a punishment. He’s not bad. He didn’t do anything wrong to make his eyes bad. It’s tough. It’s a position I hate to be in.
I want to say, “OK, just wear your glasses, no patch today” Yet, I fear what will happen if his vision doesn’t improve. I worry about if he refuses his patch, how bad will his eyes be. It’s stressful, to say the least.
I feel guilty for not taking him for an eye exam sooner. I could have found the issue years ago, had I taken him to the eye doctor sooner.
So, here I sit, searching for patches that will make him happy. Spending too much money on many designs in hopes that he will wear them and enjoy fun eye patches. I have 20 patches coming tomorrow with a reward chart, he swears he will wear them, but I know it will be hard and yet again, he will cry and beg me to just let him take them off. I’m ordering custom patches in his favorite characters in hopes that he will keep them on his glasses and find them fun to wear. Yet, I fear it’s wasted investments.
I’m not the only parent to go through this, I know. Yet, I can’t help but feel so helpless throughout it all.
It’s hard being a mom. It’s so hard enforcing this with him when he cries and begs me to just take it off.
I absolutely hate this. I really do.
Being an adult… being a mom…. sometimes it just stinks. It’s no fun being the “bad guy.”